The Guy Your Mother Warned You About Guy

Guyography

MOTTO: "If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with."

TURN ONS: female women, Viagra

TURN OFFS: moist towelettes, catalogue shopping

IF I COULD BE ANY ANIMAL, I WOULD BE...
a Panther

We met this tall, cool drink of water in a sleazy, run-down massage parlor in Tulsa. We weren’t sure what to make of him at first, but after speaking with him for a short time he seduced us with his eloquence and charm. Before we knew it, we were buck naked and having the time of our life.